Paper Life 23

Shang Nan hung the new Paper Doll Yu Zhibai had made for him on his backpack's zipper. As the zipper swayed with each step, the Paper Doll bobbed back and forth, the smile on its face far more radiant than when it had first been placed in Shang Nan's hands.

......

This was Shang Nan's first time back at school since the kidnapping. When his classmates saw him, they all crowded around his desk. Zhang Hu's reaction was the most dramatic -- he sprawled across Shang Nan's desk, scrutinizing him left and right, and only after confirming he wasn't missing any arms or legs did he sit back down and launch into a tirade against Lu Yang. "That dumbass was blinded by hatred!"

The class academic rep said, "It's better that he's gone. We were all suffocating before."

The PE rep said, "Finally we can play whatever sport we want."

Shang Nan looked at everyone's expressions, as if they'd just been liberated from oppression and were breathing a collective sigh of relief. He found them rather endearing.

Although Changyu High School was a private elite school -- aside from the small number of students admitted on merit through special recruitment, the remaining students all came from wealthy or powerful families -- but wealth and status still had their own hierarchy.

Lu Yang may have been a scoundrel, but his family genuinely had both money and power. Because of that, those who could afford to offend him wouldn't bother looking for trouble, and those who couldn't afford to offend him would steer even further clear. His family wasn't on the same level as the Shang Family, but Shang Nan had always kept a low profile at school, and Lu Yang was smart enough to never pick a fight with Shang Nan.

After they finished their lively denunciation of the absent Lu Yang, the PE rep's eyes suddenly locked onto something. "Wait -- I just noticed, you came to school with Yu Zhibai today. Why? You two shouldn't be on the same route, right?"

At the start of the school year, students had to fill out personal information forms that included name, contact details, and home address. Most of the class lived in various large and small villa communities in the city center. Only Yu Zhibai's name was followed by: Happiness Community.

In their eyes, Happiness Community was equivalent to a slum. Surely Shang Nan didn't pass through a junkyard on his way to school.

They did like Yu Zhibai. He was a good student with excellent grades but never acted superior. If anyone had a question and asked him, he'd always help.

But they were, after all, people from different worlds.

They would interact with someone like Yu Zhibai, but they wouldn't develop any deep friendship.

Shang Nan propped his chin on his hand, twirling a pen in his fingers. His tone when he answered sounded like he was in a good mood. "He and I are good friends, so we came to school together."

The group's expressions varied, but because of Shang Nan's answer, their smiles toward Yu Zhibai all suddenly became much more genuine.

After they dispersed, the homeroom teacher sent someone to call Shang Nan to her office.

Zhang Xueli had taken a severe scolding from the higher-ups these past two days. She'd spent several nights writing reports and self-criticisms over the student incident, and the dark circles under her eyes were impossible to conceal.

When Shang Nan entered, she poured him a cup of water. After sitting down, she sighed and asked, "How's your health?"

Shang Nan held the disposable paper cup. The heat from the water passed through the uninsulated layer into his palm. He shook his head. "I'm fine. I felt a bit unwell when I first went to the hospital, but I'm much better now."

To anyone other than Yu Zhibai, Shang Nan would never reveal that he hadn't suffered so much as a scratch.

Zhang Xueli's brow furrowed even tighter. "To be honest, none of us expected Lu Yang to do something like this to you. However, he'd already filed his transfer paperwork before the incident, so our school no longer has the authority to discipline him."

Shang Nan already knew this. He nodded and asked, puzzled, "Then what did you call me here to talk about...?"

"Mainly to chat about something else." Zhang Xueli's expression relaxed slightly. "Before your incident, a student left a note on my desk. On it, this student wrote that you and Yu Zhibai are in a relationship. I called you in today to ask about this -- is what this student said true, or just baseless rumor?"

Shang Nan took a long time to answer, because it was true.

Having been a teacher for so many years, Zhang Xueli could read the shifts in Shang Nan's expression. She cleared her throat and said, "Although our school has always had a relatively relaxed policy on these matters, I still have to remind you -- right now, academics should be the priority."

"Especially for Yu Zhibai. I'm sure you're aware of his family situation. Studying is his only way out."

Zhang Xueli hoped Shang Nan wouldn't be a negative influence on Yu Zhibai.

But what she didn't know was that the person in this world who most, most, most, most, most, most wanted Yu Zhibai to have a smooth and happy life was Shang Nan.

Shang Nan acknowledged with a sound. "Understood."

Seeing that Zhang Xueli didn't seem very convinced and looked like she wanted him to write a letter of guarantee, Shang Nan paused for a moment, then raised his hand and pledged, "I promise I will also study hard, not hold back classmate Yu Zhibai, advance together with classmate Yu Zhibai, jointly build a beautiful homeland, become pillars of Huinanfang, and add bricks and tiles to Huinanfang's glorious prosperity."

His perfectly serious demeanor made Zhang Xueli laugh. After her laughter faded, she said, "Alright then, let's set a goal. Move up two hundred places in the rankings before next week's monthly exam. Can you do that?"

Before Shang Nan could answer, she added, "Don't say I didn't give you two a chance. If you have the determination, then show it through action. Otherwise, how will you prove you genuinely like him?"

Shang Nan: "Then why don't you make Yu Zhibai prove he genuinely likes me?"

Zhang Xueli couldn't help giving Shang Nan a light smack on the head. "Are you stupid? His grades are that good and he's still dating you -- isn't that proof enough?"

Shang Nan thought: 'This is manipulation. I will not be manipulated.'

......

In the afternoon, Shang Nan lay sprawled on his desk napping.

Outside, half the sky was blanketed in thick gray cumulus clouds, while the other half revealed a fingernail-sized sun, like a tiny golden carp scale stuck onto a deep-toned cotton candy sky.

The class life committee rep posted in the group chat: We're going on a field trip to Jinzi Lake next week. If there's anything you want to eat, let me know, though I won't necessarily buy it for you. [smiley face]

Zhang Hu: Buy eel! I want grilled eel!

Classmate A: I want drunken shrimp!

Classmate B: For barbecue, I want grilled wagyu. Not the teppanyaki kind -- just buy it, cut it into small pieces, and skewer them on metal sticks...

Classmate C: Fried chicken fried chicken fried chicken fried chicken! Crispy on the outside, tender on the inside. Basically, it just has to be delicious! Life committee rep, look at me!

Life committee rep: Look at your mom.

The life rep's outburst set off an avalanche of "hahahaha" in the chat. Amid all of them, a single reply from Yu Zhibai broke the formation.

Yu Zhibai: Are there grilled lamb chops? Shang Nan likes them.

Someone scrolled through the chat history, saw it, and directly quoted the message: Oh my god, does this mean what I think it means?

Then came a neat chain of "Oh my god, does this mean what I think it means?" Yu Zhibai turned off his phone and didn't look again. He had nothing he wanted to eat. He'd simply stated what Shang Nan liked to eat. These people were making a fuss over nothing.

Shang Nan had no idea what was going on. When he woke up, he was still groggy. The math teacher at the podium looked very displeased, so he hurriedly grabbed his pen and pretended to scribble on his test paper.

Zhang Hu, sitting in front of him, turned around holding his workbook as if he were about to ask Shang Nan a question, but instead he asked, "Are you and Yu Zhibai together?"

"What?" Shang Nan was still a bit dazed. He hadn't fully come back from his long nap.

"Yu Zhibai posted something really interesting in the group chat earlier. You should check the class group." Zhang Hu chewed on the end of his pen with a frown and turned back around. If Shang Nan weren't one of the parties involved in this whispered exchange, Zhang Hu would probably have been fooled like everyone else.

Shang Nan sneaked out his phone. There were tons of messages in the group, and he was too lazy to scroll through, so he went straight to searching Yu Zhibai's message history.

Just one line -- Are there lamb chops? Shang Nan likes them.

After reading it, Shang Nan's face was covered in question marks. What was wrong with that? These people's imaginations were way too active!

Zhang Hu hadn't hidden his conversation with Shang Nan from Yu Zhibai. But Yu Zhibai waited until Shang Nan had confirmed things himself before speaking. "Does it bother you?"

"No." Shang Nan denied it instinctively. He put his phone away. "It doesn't bother me. I'm just a bit curious."

Yu Zhibai studied Shang Nan's expression intently. His eyes were different from a human's -- unblinking, pitch-black, as if they'd cast out a handful of tiny, razor-sharp hooks that made every fine hair on the face of whoever he stared at tremble and quiver.

Shang Nan distinctly felt his face rising in temperature -- rising, rising, rising -- until it reached a scalding threshold. He couldn't help but speak. "Are you checking if I'm lying?"

"No." Yu Zhibai lowered his eyes, and most of that burning gaze was hidden. "When I have nothing to do, I just want to look at you. I think I like you too much."

Shang Nan felt that sentence packed an equally devastating punch.

"Where did it learn to say things like that?"

[14: It doesn't need to learn. This is something every species should instinctively know. Only you humans need to learn how to treat someone well.]

......

Shang Nan and Yu Zhibai's relationship couldn't really be called a secret. Everyone had probably figured it out, since Shang Nan had once pursued Yu Zhibai in a spectacularly public fashion, and now that the two had suddenly become close, they had to be together.

Out of respect for Shang Nan, the class also suddenly became warmer toward Yu Zhibai in a way they hadn't been before. But Yu Zhibai remained the same as always -- he was clearly only different with Shang Nan, and conspicuously so.

Yet despite all this, Yu Zhibai's Corruption Value had remained stuck at its previous number without any change. At night, however, it would produce noticeable fluctuations.

Shang Nan couldn't read anything from Yu Zhibai's face. He wondered several times whether Yu Zhibai's expressions could even change freely, or whether he'd crafted them onto himself.

After the Corruption Value fluctuated in the middle of the night for several consecutive days, Shang Nan finally couldn't sit still. During evening study hall, he wrote a note and passed it to Yu Zhibai: Tomorrow's Friday. Zhang Xueli said there'll be heavy rain in the morning and we don't need to come to school. I'm scared. Can I come sleep at your place tonight?

He had no ulterior motives.

His entire focus was on the abnormal Corruption Value spikes at midnight. He wanted to know what Yu Zhibai was doing in the middle of the night.

After a while, the slip of paper crawled on its own from Yu Zhibai's desk into Shang Nan's palm.

-- Scared of what?

So many unnecessary questions. Shang Nan wrote on the paper: I'm afraid of thunder.

Yu Zhibai said okay.

After evening study hall ended, students all surged toward the school gate. The ones still at school at this hour were basically all seniors.

Shang Nan walked with his head down, fastening the buttons on his jacket. He was afraid of the cold, and Huinanfang's winters were not only cold but also extremely damp. He didn't like having 14 warm him up. One night a while back, 14 had sensed his body temperature was too low and secretly warmed him up, but lost control of the temperature and scalded Shang Nan awake from his sleep. From that day on, Shang Nan had forbidden 14 from heating his body.

At the school gate, Yu Zhibai placed a fluffy pair of earmuffs on Shang Nan's head. They were white, with a rabbit ear on each side. Shang Nan reached up to touch them. "Yours?"

Yu Zhibai shook his head. "I made them last night." Shang Nan's ears had been frozen red outside. He had noticed.

"Ooh~~ What's~~ going~~ on~~ here~~?" Zhang Hu's drawn-out voice drifted over from the distance. He quickly closed in, riding a very cool black electric scooter.

He weaved through the crowd and stopped beside them, his gaze landing on Shang Nan's earmuffs. "Holy crap, those are cute. Where'd you buy them? I want a pair too. I'm about to get frostbite."

Shang Nan couldn't very well say Yu Zhibai made them. "Yu Zhibai's grandmother made them."

Zhang Hu's face fell. Yu Zhibai's grandmother was very old -- he knew that. "Alright then. I'm off. You two be careful on the way home."

After Zhang Hu left, Yu Zhibai took Shang Nan's hand. "Let's go. Time to go home."

Walking to Yu Zhibai's house took a good half hour.

North-South Straight Road stretched on endlessly in a straight line. A car slowly drove toward them from the distance, stopping in front of them. The chubby driver rolled down his window. "Get in, Xiao Bai!"

"Oh! And Xiao Bai's boyfriend!"

If one ignored the fact that he was a Paper Person -- and a relatively sloppily made one at that, with bits of uncut paper edges sticking out in places -- he actually looked quite likable.

This time, he drove a bit faster than last time. In the car, Yu Zhibai told Shang Nan, "These earmuffs -- I made them based on the style Yu She once bought for me."

Shang Nan had seen Yu She once, in the tunnel.

Today, he saw her again.

When the car entered the tunnel, they encountered the same situation as last time. The lights flickered on and off several times, and Yu She in her red dress approached from the distance, emerging through a haze of fog, forcing their car to stop.

If he hadn't known she meant no harm and was Yu Zhibai's mother, Shang Nan figured this scene would have given him cardiac arrest -- it was far more terrifying than their last encounter.

Yu She happened to be standing right outside the window on Shang Nan's side, and she raised her hand. Before she could knock, Shang Nan rolled down the window. Ignoring his own heart pounding loudly, he flashed Yu She a brilliant smile. "Good evening, Auntie."

Yu She didn't have the twisted face of a malevolent ghost, nor was she bloody or missing limbs. On the contrary, she was beautiful -- with a perfectly proportioned oval face and features that, while not sharply defined, were as gentle and lovely as a wild lily just unfurling its petals in the mountains. The red dress added a touch of striking color.

Yu She saw Shang Nan and paused. "You're... the good friend Zhibai mentioned?"

The driver poked his head out and said very loudly, "Yu She, Yu She, not a good friend -- a boyfriend!"

Yu She leaned down, her face drawing close to Shang Nan's. Up close, Shang Nan could still sense the ways she wasn't human. She was a ghost -- not only was her face bloodless, it had a faintly bluish tinge. Her gaze was vacant and stiff, the whites of her eyes threaded with red veins, and her lips were a pale, ashen blue -- the lip color of someone who had been dead for a long time and lost all vitality.

Yu Zhibai reached over and gripped Shang Nan's hand, pulling him back slightly. He said to Yu She, "His name is Shang Nan."

Yu She slowly straightened up. She smiled faintly. "It's our first meeting, but I don't have anything nice to give you. I'm sorry."

All she had was a ghost soul that could vanish at any moment. She could leave at any time.

Yu Zhibai handed her a Little Paper Person, said goodnight, and told the driver to go.

Just like that other time, Yu She held the Little Paper Person and gazed in the direction they'd departed for a long while.

"She's very beautiful," Shang Nan said. "She must be very gentle and kind."

Yu Zhibai pressed the window back up. His tone was subdued. "I can't really remember." Noticing Shang Nan looking at him quizzically, he tapped his own temple with a curled index finger. "I really can't remember anymore."

It was a Paper Person. It was never possible for it to possess the joys, sorrows, and emotions that the original Yu Zhibai would have had. From the moment Yu Changyue created it, the things that belonged to a human had been slowly disappearing, while the desires and emotions unique to a monster had been slowly taking root inside it.

Its attachment to Yu She was instinct. Yu She's attachment to it was also instinct. Even though both of their feelings toward each other from years ago had grown extremely faint.

The lights in Happiness Community were very bright, illuminating even the wild grass in the yard until it glistened.

Shang Nan stepped out of the car and instinctively reached for Yu Zhibai's hand, even though the other's hand was ice-cold.

Shang Nan's gaze drifted toward a corner of the flower bed. "What's that?"

The grass there was the thickest -- dead yellow and living green growing side by side -- and it was trembling slightly. It wasn't the wind. Wind wouldn't blow only one spot.

The driver also got out of the car. "I'll go check."

He walked over as he spoke. Being Paper People, they naturally weren't afraid of the things humans found eerie. They were already bizarre enough themselves. Surely they wouldn't be scared of -- while thinking this, he reached out and parted the grass, and a bloated man's face was fully exposed before the driver.

"AAAAAAHHHH AOOOOOWWW!" The driver let out a bloodcurdling scream, and didn't forget to clamp the grass back shut and press it down tight. He ran back, his face white with panic. "It's a person. Nearly scared me to death."

Shang Nan: "..."

The grass was still moving. An arm reached out, parting the grass down the middle, and then Li Rongping crawled out from inside.

His face was a ghastly white, his features bloated -- noticeably larger than the last time Shang Nan had seen him outside Yu Zhibai's home. He was a completely different person from that day. His eye sockets were deeply sunken, his gaze lifeless, and his lips were cracked with deep fissures.

Seeing Shang Nan and Yu Zhibai, Li Rongping's expression instantly became incredibly complicated. His lips moved several times. He pointed at the grass and said, "My cat's lost. I came to look for the cat."

After saying this, he didn't wait to see if the people behind him believed him. He turned and walked toward his own home. Even his gait was strange -- stiff, and somehow floaty.

Not until his retreating figure disappeared did Shang Nan let out an involuntary sneeze. He turned to tug at Yu Zhibai, wanting to say let's go home, he was so cold -- but the moment he turned and looked up, he saw Yu Zhibai's snow-white face, crimson lips, and ink-black, fathomlessly deep eyes staring fixedly in the direction Li Rongping had gone.

When Shang Nan registered the change in the other's expression, his breath hitched.

"Yu Zhibai? Xiao Bai?" Shang Nan mustered his courage and tugged at Yu Zhibai's sleeve. "Let's go home..."

Yu Zhibai's eyes shifted. He slowly lowered his lids, and his gaze landed on Shang Nan's face -- bundled in earmuffs, looking warm and soft. The color of his lips also faded a few shades.

"Okay."

Shang Nan thought Yu Zhibai's reaction was probably because he really disliked Li Rongping, since the man had once splashed blood on his door.

Yu Xiaoyu was still waiting on the first-floor steps for Yu Zhibai to come home from school, as always. The crease at her knees was very deep, and when she stood up, she had to slap it smooth with some effort. She too had a love of beauty.

"Shang Nan?! You're here too?!" Yu Xiaoyu had just about finished smoothing out the creases when she looked up and saw Shang Nan standing beside Yu Zhibai. Her face lit up with delight and she was about to let out a shriek, but caught herself just in time out of consideration for Yu Zhibai.

"It's so late. What brings you here?" Yu Xiaoyu walked ahead, asking.

Shang Nan said, "I'm staying over tonight. Is that okay?"

"Of course!" Besides, whether it was okay or not wasn't her call anyway. This was Xiao Bai's house.

At the thought that Shang Nan would be here tonight, Yu Xiaoyu's steps ahead practically floated. She'd been living in constant fear these past few days, because Xiao Bai had been very abnormal at night lately -- either not sleeping, or wandering outside. She was truly afraid that if she displeased Xiao Bai somehow, he'd tear her apart.

With Shang Nan here, everything would be fine. The Xiao Bai who was with Shang Nan was the best version of Xiao Bai.

Inside, Yu Changyue was still watching television -- a very old TV set playing a very old movie. The characters' expressions were exaggerated, their body language equally so, but Yu Changyue was watching with great interest, eyes still wide open.

Hearing the door open, she looked toward the entrance and then noticed Shang Nan. She said flatly, "You're here again."

"Good evening, Grandma." Shang Nan didn't mind Yu Changyue's brusque attitude at all.

Yu Zhibai set down both his and Shang Nan's school bags, then went to the bedroom, opened the wardrobe, and with lips pressed together, very carefully selected pajamas.

He didn't have many clothes, nor did he care about appearance. Since everything was wearable anyway, he was always perfunctory when making clothes. Some pajamas even had legs of different lengths.

But Yu Zhibai didn't want Shang Nan wearing such carelessly made clothes.

Maybe he should make a set on the spot -- but it probably wouldn't dry in time.

"Yu Zhibai, I'm not that picky. As long as it's wearable, it's fine." Shang Nan stood in the bedroom doorway and said.

Yu Zhibai picked out a set that was passable. It was a bit thin -- not something he'd made himself, but something he'd bought last New Year's and never worn.

Shang Nan was used to showering before bed. The bathroom at Yu Zhibai's place was a bit small, and the water pressure was incredibly strong, hitting the skin almost painfully.

So he washed quickly and didn't take a careful look around the bathroom.

As he dried his face with a towel, the steam in the bathroom dissipated somewhat. The damp hair on his forehead was pushed up by the towel. He turned to grab his clothes, but froze when he saw the entire row of Little Paper People sitting on top of the mirror.

Yu Zhibai was doing homework. The bedroom door was flung open, and a damp, misty Shang Nan charged in. He stood rigidly beside Yu Zhibai, fists clenched, not saying a word.

Yu Zhibai didn't understand. "What's wrong?"

Shang Nan tossed the handful of Little Paper People he'd been clutching onto the desk. Having been suddenly grabbed, the little figures were already terrified. Finally free of his palm, they scattered in all directions across the desk.

"I didn't send them in there. They went in on their own. They wanted to watch."

Shang Nan's brain was working very fast at this moment. "They wanted to watch, which means you wanted to watch. Am I right?"

His eyes were lowered, fixed on Shang Nan's feet in the cool slippers -- his toes still wet, glistening with a sheen of water.

Yu Zhibai slowly raised his head. Its lips had turned a vivid red, its eyes dyed an inky black. It curved its lips into a smile and answered, "Yes."