Qin Fang once again left Xing Yan stunned with a single sentence. Recently, he had been spouting such enigmatic words.
After a while, Xing Yan finally spoke again: "I thought you were asleep."
Glancing out the car window, Qin Fang gave a helpless smile: "I was indeed very sleepy at the time, but not fully asleep yet. I heard what you said."
There was more to this statement. I heard what you said, and I also know what else you did.
With this, they had a tacit understanding, and the rest went unsaid. But Qin Fang actually continued and finished his thought.
"I originally wanted to respond, but then you kissed me, right? So I didn't dare make a sound. Anyway, I really couldn't stay awake at that point. If you want to pretend I was asleep, that's fine too."
After saying this, Qin Fang laughed inwardly first. A month ago, he would never have been able to say these words no matter what.
But times had changed. After spending a long time with Xing Yan, his tolerance for shamelessness had increased quite a bit.
Xing Yan, needless to say, was even more so. He had kissed Qin Fang to his face before, so he wasn't afraid of Qin Fang knowing at all.
Therefore, Xing Yan very calmly grunted in acknowledgment, not feeling embarrassed in the slightest.
Qin Fang glanced at him: "You said not to figure it out. I actually didn't quite understand what you meant, but I can guess more or less."
The warm air blew directly at his face. Xing Yan lightly adjusted the air vent and asked, "What did you guess?"
Qin Fang pursed his lips: "I don't really like what I guessed, so I don't want to say it either."
Xing Yan said, "Try me."
"I guess I've encountered a player, but the player can't bring himself to make a move anymore." Qin Fang looked straight at Xing Yan, his chin set in a slightly stern line, but then he smiled again, shaking his head. "Just a wild guess. Whether it's right or not, you don't have to tell me."
Xing Yan didn't speak. Qin Fang continued, "But at this point, you can't stop me anymore. Whether I figure it out or not is my own business. Whether the game continues, you can't decide either."
In fact, Qin Fang's mood wasn't very good today. Xing Yan had sensed this from the moment they got in the car. Compared to usual, he was a bit more sharp-tongued today, with a hint of aggression.
Xing Yan's silence made the atmosphere in the car slightly stagnant. Qin Fang cleared his throat and said, "I may indeed be a bit slow in this regard, but I've never been perfunctory with you. I'm very serious."
Xing Yan said, "I know."
"Because first of all, you're my buddy," Qin Fang stepped on the brake at a red light and continued, "You're not just anyone. Even if you say from the beginning you didn't really want to be my buddy, the good things you've done for me are real."
Outside, the rain still hadn't stopped, as if making up for the nearly a month without rain all at once. All the cars had their hazard lights on. It was getting a bit dark.
"The reason I haven't given you an answer isn't to string you along. On the contrary, it's precisely because it's you that I'm being more cautious."
The light turned green and Qin Fang slowly started the car. As he spoke, he tilted his chin slightly towards Xing Yan, his pace neither fast nor slow, very steady.
"You know without me saying, some relationships can't go back once they change. If you go down the wrong path, even breaking up is an option."
Maybe it was because of today's weather, or maybe because Xing Yan had brought it up, but Qin Fang had said so much all at once, which was quite unexpected. He himself found it unexpected too. He generally didn't like to voice the thoughts in his heart, but everything Qin Fang said today was what was truly on his mind.
"So there's no way I can make any decision on impulse. My regard for you, my care for this relationship, requires me to consider carefully before taking the next step." His phone vibrated in his pants pocket, probably a message from someone. Qin Fang took it out for a glance and casually set it aside.
Xing Yan remained silent the whole time, listening to Qin Fang speak.
"The things I've said to you are also all true. I haven't tried to fool you with lies." Qin Fang smiled faintly, looking ahead as he said, "I just...really want to treat you well."
Saying this was a bit hard for the straightforward guy. Qin Fang crooked a finger to scratch his nose and took a breath before finishing the last sentence: "You're quite...alluring, cool boy. What I'm saying today is to tell you, if you want to back out now, it's already too late. You brought me into the game, and I'm already in. From here on, whether we keep playing, how we play, that's for me to decide."
Xing Yan still didn't say anything. He turned his head to look at Qin Fang.
Qin Fang met his gaze and raised his eyebrows.
This Qin Fang was a bit unfamiliar. Unlike last time at the gym when he angrily questioned if Xing Yan couldn't be his buddy without being gay, today's Qin Fang wasn't angry at all, even smiling as he spoke.
But today he was absolutely domineering.
Domineering but not overbearing, every word from his mouth sincere.
No matter what side of him, it made one's heart race.
Xing Yan looked at him for a long time. Qin Fang wasn't afraid to meet his gaze either, not feeling self-conscious at all, even smiling and asking, "Am I super handsome or what?"
"Super handsome," Xing Yan played along, dragging out his words to emphasize the degree.
Qin Fang laughed, his shoulders shaking along: "I think I'm super handsome too."
Qin Fang dropped Xing Yan off at the dorm building. Before he got out of the car, Qin Fang called out to him. Xing Yan looked back.
Qin Fang blinked and said to him, "It's okay if you want to back out. But if I'm sure of my own heart, no matter how far you go, I can reel you back in. I just want to remind you, matters of the heart can be left to fate. Meeting and parting are all destiny. No outcome is wrong. But if you're playing me, if you're not sincere, then I might beat you up."
Qin Fang stared into his eyes and said solemnly, "At that time, let's not talk about being buddies or not. Let's just fight to the death, because I'm super vicious."
The super vicious Qin Fang was expressionless. Xing Yan looked at him and smiled, the corner of his lips curling up.
He raised his hand and pressed it on Qin Fang's head, ruffling his hair. Then his hand slid down to rest on Qin Fang's neck, cupping it and gently squeezing. Qin Fang felt like he was Jian Muyang, who he usually kneaded.
Xing Yan's palm was very warm. Although this action seemed a bit ambiguous, Qin Fang had to admit this feeling wasn't unpleasant.
Xing Yan withdrew his hand, grabbed his backpack and coat from the back, and said with a smile, "I'm off."
With that, he opened the door and got out of the car. Qin Fang still hadn't left after Xing Yan entered the building. Xing Yan turned around and waved his arm at him, then ran up the stairs.
A good-looking person made everything look good. Many ordinary, everyday actions looked especially cool when he did them.
Addicted. Qin Fang started the car to make a U-turn, saying this to himself in his heart. Since the video incident with Qin Fang, Hua Tong hasn't been able to face him with the same attitude as before. Even though Qin Fang said that he and Xing Yan are still like brothers, Hua Tong always feels that his brother is different from before.
Qin Fang said, "You should walk on the other side of the road."
Hua Tong didn't react in time, "Why?"
"I'm afraid that later you'll walk into the middle of the road and get hit by a car," Qin Fang said, "Are you afraid that if you get too close to me, I'll touch your butt?"
"Fuck." Hua Tong finally came back to his senses and walked close to Qin Fang, "Should I take off my pants and let you touch?"
"No, not pretty enough." Qin Fang shook his head, "We gays have such high standards."
After the video, Qin Fang has been making jokes about himself like this. Anyway, everyone thinks that he and Xing Yan are like that, and they all consider him to have come out of the closet. Qin Fang doesn't care about this and just says it jokingly.
Hua Tong said, "I see that your Weibo followers have increased a lot, already over two thousand."
Qin Fang said, "It's three thousand now, I'm an internet celebrity."
"Can you get advertising deals? If you get a deal, let's go out and have some fun together." Hua Tong asked.
"Do you look down on those merchants," Qin Fang said helplessly, "You think three thousand followers is enough for advertising deals? Or do you look down on the platform?"
Hua Tong threw his head back and laughed, then said, "Later people will say that you planned it. Damn, the day before you gave a bike, and the next day you immediately got an advertising deal, hahaha, such great marketing."
"Shut up," Qin Fang tucked his chin into his shirt collar. After a rainy day, the temperature drops below zero at night. "In the past, I used to wear single-layer pants to play in the winter. Now, before winter has even started, I already want to wear long johns."
"I'm already wearing them," Hua Tong patted his legs, "Super warm."
Originally, Qin Fang didn't want to come out in such cold weather. He just wanted to hide in the warm dorm room and watch a movie or something. But Hua Tong insisted on playing pool, so Qin Fang came out with him.
Qin Fang is now considered a celebrity in the school. Before, many people knew him, but now it's even more exaggerated. Acquaintances greet him when they meet, and even those who don't know him always look at him.
"Celebrity treatment." Hua Tong missed a shot and laughed at him.
Qin Fang doesn't care, he just pretends not to see. The school is just this big, anything exciting will attract attention.
This little incident certainly couldn't escape the circle of friends. That day, Cheng Dong posted a WeChat Moments, taking a screenshot of Qin Fang's video, posting three smiley face emojis, and then writing: My bike is on the hot search.
Below, Feng Zhe replied to him: Didn't I tell you not to be so shameless? That's my bro Fang's bike, stay away and don't try to gain popularity.
Cheng Dong replied to him: I've never been on the hot search, I just want to get close!
Feng Zhe: Get lost! Put away that big face of yours! Such a huge face!
These past few days, WeChat has been filled with people coming to join in the excitement and ask questions. Qin Fang later got tired of it and posted the video to his own Moments, saying: It's me, it's me, it's all me, don't ask anymore, if you ask again, I'm charging money.
The comments below were super lively, classmates and friends who hadn't been in contact for a long time all came out to post a "hahaha", the Moments were as lively as a vegetable market.
There was an ex-girlfriend from who knows how long ago, who commented to Qin Fang: Hahaha, my ex-boyfriend came out of the closet and got on the hot search, rounding up, I've also been on the hot search.
Qin Fang wondered how the rounding could lead to this conclusion.
Below there was also a comment from Xiao Hua: ...Okay, I was wondering why I've wasted so many years without any results. It seems it's not that I lack charm, it's just the wrong gender. It's not your fault or mine, it's fate!
Feng Zhe, Cheng Dong, Xiao Peng and the others all replied under her comment with more than ten "ha"s. Feng Zhe had said before this incident that Xiao Hua had liked Qin Fang for so many years, and now she probably has to give up, even if she doesn't want to, she has no choice.
If this could really make Xiao Hua stop being stubborn, it would be quite worthwhile. She's a good girl, but because of this matter, she hasn't come out to play much in the past two years, afraid of feeling uncomfortable when meeting.
Actually, even without this incident, Qin Fang felt that it was about time. As they grew up, the stubbornness they had before gradually dissipated.
Feng Zhe and the others also invited Qin Fang to bring Xing Yan out to play together, joking about their relationship in the group chat. Qin Fang took a screenshot and sent it to Xing Yan, saying: They want to throw a banquet to welcome you.
Xing Yan replied to him: Let them throw it then.
Qin Fang said: If they throw it, they'll make me pay. I'll treat.
Xing Yan: Then I won't go.
Qin Fang: Hahaha, Yan-ge is so real.
Xing Yan said: No need for a welcome, if they're sincere, a small gift is enough.
Qin Fang: Hahahahaha
Qin Fang took a screenshot of their conversation and sent it to the group: My Yan-ge says a small gift is enough, no need to be so polite. So you guys can just spend a thousand or eight hundred to show your sincerity, more than that would be too much.
I'm Windwalker, your friendly neighborhood translator who loves nothing more than getting lost in a good book. When I'm not translating, you might find me hiking through nature or curled up with my cat. I hope my translations bring as much joy to you as they do to me!
Give me feedback at moc.ebircssutol@reklawdniw.