He Had Also Protected Him Once in Secret Part 2

Da Hong led the way, his walk showing a slight awkwardness. Gu Qingzhou didn't know that his leg had been broken by someone, and seeing this, he subconsciously asked, "Did you hurt your leg?"

Da Hong turned to look at him, then waved his hand and smiled. "What hurt? I was stupid a few years ago, pissed someone off, and got it broken. So now I've got a limp."

He no longer cared about it, but Gu Qingzhou felt he had misspoken and didn't know how to console him. The two entered the empty restaurant and found a seat. Da Hong called out to the young girl dozing off at the counter, "Waitress, we'd like to order."

The small restaurant didn't have a wide variety of dishes, and since it was winter, the selection was even smaller. They only had some frozen dumplings and noodle soup. Da Hong had the waitress bring two large plates of dumplings and a few bottles of beer. Nibbling on peanuts, he said, "Eating hot dumplings on a cold day is the best. You should try some."

Gu Qingzhou wasn't particularly warm toward anyone other than Jiang Xu, so he could only make small talk. "I heard from Jiang Xu that you opened a car repair shop?"

Da Hong said, "Just barely getting by. It's near the station. Business is good near the station. Once the renovations are done, I'll start making money next spring. By the way, what do you do now? You must be a big boss, right?"

Gu Qingzhou didn't know how to answer. "Not a big boss, just an office job."

Da Hong ate quickly, and half of the nearly half a kilo of dumplings vanished in an instant. Hearing his answer, he said, "An office job? An office job is good too. You don't have to be out in the sun and wind. Jiang Xu has an office job now too, even if he's just a junior employee. Thinking about it now, it was a good thing he decided to repeat a year back then. Otherwise, he would have ended up in the streets too."

He was about the same age as Gu Qingzhou, but he looked like he was thirty. His eyes held a world-weariness, making it hard to connect him with the hooligan with bleached yellow hair from the past. Da Hong drank a glass of beer, and after catching his breath, he said, "You two... still haven't let go?"

Gu Qingzhou wanted to say they had let go, for four or five years, before getting entangled again. But he wasn't used to discussing such things with others, so he said succinctly, "We were apart for a while. We ran into each other again a few months ago."

Da Hong was still single and couldn't quite understand that kind of emotion, but he had seen with his own eyes how Gu Qingzhou treated Jiang Xu back in school. "If you ran into each other, then so be it. I think even if Jiang Xu really found a wife, she could never treat him better than you do. You two are the most suitable for each other."

Gu Qingzhou knew he was joking and asked casually, "Then what if he finds a wife in the future, and that wife treats Jiang Xu especially well, even better than I treat him? Would you think they're suitable?"

Da Hong thought for a moment, then shook his head seriously. "That wouldn't work. Jiang Xu would have to be willing to treat her well too. Even though Jiang Xu used to mess with you all the time back then, he was actually pretty good to you. Otherwise, he wouldn't have gotten into a fight and dropped out of school, right?"

Hearing this, Gu Qingzhou stiffened slightly. He subconsciously looked up at him, but saw that Da Hong was engrossed in eating his dumplings. He tightened his grip on his chopsticks, then loosened it, trying to casually fish for information. "...Is that so? But I don't think he needed to get into that fight."

Besides the teachers, no one knew why Jiang Xu dropped out of school back then. There were only faint rumors that he had gotten into a fight with some thugs from another school and put one of them in the hospital.

Da Hong was brutally honest. Hearing this, he slammed his chopsticks down on the table. "What are you talking about? How could he not fight? That bastard from the sports school next door, what was his name again? Zhang Dalong. He saw you and Jiang Xu sticking together after school and said you two were fags, threatening to report you to the school. A person like that has to be beaten. If Jiang Xu hadn't cornered him in an alley and beaten him up to scare him, would you two have been able to stay in school?"

After saying that, he remembered that Jiang Xu did, in fact, drop out. He rubbed his nose and said no more.

Zhang Dalong...

Gu Qingzhou sat motionless, quickly digging this person out from his past memories, but the information was pitifully scarce. He only remembered that he had beaten Zhang Dalong up for trying to extort protection money, and later, he and Jiang Xu had pinned him down and beaten him up in the school hallway. The last memory was just of being neighbors, occasionally passing each other on the way to school.

Gu Qingzhou didn't know how the other person had found out about him and Jiang Xu. Perhaps it was when he deliberately waited for Jiang Xu on the way home from school every day. Perhaps it was when he followed behind Jiang Xu every day. Or perhaps it was on a rainy evening after night class, when Gu Qingzhou had pinned Jiang Xu against a corner in an alley and kissed him.

They were neighbors, and they lived close by. It was far too easy for someone to find out. After all, back then, they were inseparable.

Gu Qingzhou never knew that Jiang Xu had dropped out of school because of this. Jiang Xu had never told him, not a single word.

Perhaps Jiang Xu wasn't unable to bear poverty...

It was only when he stepped out of school and into society, when he had to start working to support his family, that he suddenly realized how difficult it was for two men to be together, that he suddenly realized what a lifetime meant.

It was also at that moment that Jiang Xu learned that the word "homosexual" was more crushing to a person's spirit than poverty.

...wanted to say something, but nothing would come out.

The dumplings on the table had been unknowingly cleared away. Seeing that Gu Qingzhou had barely touched his chopsticks, Da Hong felt a bit embarrassed and was about to call the waitress for another plate, but Gu Qingzhou stopped him.

"It's okay,"

Gu Qingzhou finally came back to his senses. "I'm not very hungry."

After speaking, he stood up from his seat to pay the bill. Da Hong reached out to stop him, but was a step too slow due to his leg. "Hey, how can I let you do that? I said it was my treat," he said anxiously.

Gu Qingzhou's phone vibrated. It was a message from Jiang Xu. He opened it, glanced at it, then turned the screen off again. He said to Da Hong, "It's fine. Jiang Xu is nearby. You can treat me next time."

He then pushed open the glass door and walked outside. His thin back looked somewhat ethereal under the light. Gu Qingzhou walked steadily, but from behind, Da Hong felt as if he was walking with great difficulty, as if he might collapse at any second.

Jiang Xu had said on the phone that he would walk over on his own two legs, but in fact, he came on a motorcycle, which was parked just a few steps from the station. Gu Qingzhou saw him as soon as he came out. He stood in place for a second or two before walking over.

Jiang Xu was holding a helmet. The snowflakes on it had melted into water, glistening under the streetlight. When he saw Gu Qingzhou, he grinned. "Not bad, you didn't get lost. Get on."

He tossed a helmet to him. Gu Qingzhou caught it subconsciously, but then, as if remembering something, he turned back to the back seat of his own car, took out four or five gift boxes, and handed them to Jiang Xu before getting on the back of the motorcycle.

Jiang Xu glanced at them, then hung them on the handlebars. "What's this stuff? Bird's nest?"

He couldn't see Gu Qingzhou's face, only heard him give a sound of agreement from behind. "A meeting gift for your mother."

Jiang Xu muttered, "Really, more money than sense."

There was snow on the road, and a motorcycle offered little protection, so for safety, Jiang Xu drove very slowly. He felt that Gu Qingzhou's mood was a bit strange. He hadn't clung to him like he usually did upon seeing him. He couldn't help but ask, "What's wrong with you?"

Gu Qingzhou's answer was irrelevant to the question. "I just ran into Da Hong and had a meal with him."

Jiang Xu said, "I know, you told me in your message."

Gu Qingzhou paused again and again, hesitated again and again, but in the end, he couldn't stop himself from asking, "Did you drop out of school back then because Zhang Dalong found out about us..."

The roar of the motorcycle was too loud. At first, Jiang Xu didn't hear clearly, but then he realized what Gu Qingzhou was asking. He adjusted his helmet and said nonchalantly, "I think so. I don't remember clearly. Why are you asking about that?"

Snowflakes fell on his shoulders, seeping in with a faint coolness. Suddenly, Gu Qingzhou cared a great deal, more than Jiang Xu himself cared about the matter. He moved his lips silently. "I dragged you down..."

"What does it have to do with you,"

Jiang Xu's tone was still dismissive. "If I didn't fight him, I would have fought someone else. Besides, with my crappy grades, what good would it have done to stay in school? So I dropped out. What's the big deal? Our school had plenty of dropouts."

He was completely unconcerned, feeling that the matter was trivial and not worth remembering.

Gu Qingzhou didn't believe him and asked in a low voice, "Then why did you decide to repeat the year?"

Jiang Xu fell silent at the question, and the motorcycle slowed down. He seemed to be in silent contemplation, or perhaps deep in thought. After a moment, he spoke. "I just... felt that a person should have some ambition. I couldn't be a little punk for my whole life, could I?"

Jiang Xu had lived the first half of his life in a daze. He only thought about getting through the day and never considered what the future would be like. But he knew he couldn't stay in the mud forever, just messing around in the streets without a purpose, getting his leg broken by someone like Da Hong.

That was not the life Jiang Xu wanted.

Gu Qingzhou had taken off his helmet at some point. His voice was a bit clearer than before. Snow blew against his face, melting into faint streaks of water from the warmth of his skin. He unconsciously tightened his grip on the corner of Jiang Xu's clothes and asked in a low voice, "...Why didn't you tell me about that back then?"

Gu Qingzhou had poured his heart and soul into being good to Jiang Xu for three years and received nothing in return, leaving him with only a heart full of resentment. But in the end, Jiang Xu had protected him once.

Jiang Xu thought about it for a moment, then said, "I don't remember. I probably forgot."

Or perhaps, he felt that their lives would have no connection from that point on, that there was no need for any connection. Just like their grades, just like their lives.

Jiang Xu repeated a year and finally got into university. When he was a freshman, Gu Qingzhou was a sophomore. When he was a sophomore, Gu Qingzhou was a junior. Although it was only a year's difference, it felt as if Jiang Xu could never catch up, like the distance from City A to Hai City, a whole two thousand kilometers away.

Perhaps the wind was a bit strong. Gu Qingzhou unconsciously lowered his head. He pressed it against Jiang Xu's back and remained silent for a long time. The wind and snow whipped into his collar. Suddenly, he spoke. "Jiang Xu, if you ever stop liking me, you have to tell me..."

Jiang Xu raised an eyebrow, finding the question absurd. "And what good would telling you do?"

Gu Qingzhou pulled at the corner of his lips. "Maybe I'll let you go..."

The love Gu Qingzhou had learned before was one of possession. If he liked something, he had to hold it tightly in his palm. But now, he suddenly felt that Jiang Xu's wishes were more important.

Before he could finish, the moving motorcycle suddenly stopped. Jiang Xu put one foot on the ground to maintain balance, then took off his helmet and turned his head to say abruptly, "Gu Qingzhou, are you insane?"

Gu Qingzhou wasn't wearing his helmet. Specks of snow dotted his thick eyelashes, melting into water a moment later. The corners of his eyes were slightly red as he looked at Jiang Xu. The tip of his nose was red too, and his cheeks were cold, streaked with thin traces of water.

Seeing this, Jiang Xu couldn't bring himself to say what he was about to say. He said dryly, "You fucking seduced me, and now you're saying this kind of thing. How are you even more of a scumbag than me?"

A lump formed in Gu Qingzhou's throat, leaving him unable to speak. His eyelashes trembled unconsciously, the water on them reflecting a field of shattered starlight.

Seeing this, Jiang Xu asked irritably, "Are you sure that when the time comes and I don't like you anymore, you'll be able to let go without a fuss?"

Gu Qingzhou was very, very, extremely unsure. "..."