He Had Waited After All

When two proud and arrogant people get together, one must inevitably be the first to lower their head. Gu Qingzhou had lowered his head for so many years, so it was fine for Jiang Xu to do it once.

He actually understood everything. He understood Gu Qingzhou's awkwardness, he understood how Gu Qingzhou never said what he meant, and he knew that the other person was actually as innocent as a child. One second he would be crying his heart out, but give him a piece of candy, and the next second he could smile at you with tears in his eyes.

Gu Qingzhou had nothing. When he drove away, he was numb and lost, not knowing where to go back to, or perhaps nowhere was his home. He could only keep driving forward, but after going around in circles, he still ended up stopping where he started.

He didn't even dare to look back to see if Jiang Xu was following him.

The behavior of the two of them was a bit strange, but in front of a bar full of drunkards, it didn't seem surprising. Jiang Xu didn't say anything more. He found Gu Qingzhou's car keys in his pocket, then used his sleeve to wipe away the tear stains on the other's face, and said in a low voice, "I'll take you home."

Gu Qingzhou, perhaps due to the alcohol or something else, made no further movements. He stumbled and let Jiang Xu help him into the car. He leaned weakly against the passenger seat, the jumbled neon lights from the roadside reflecting in his dark, empty eyes, which then slowly closed.

Jiang Xu wasn't sure if Gu Qingzhou was drunk. While watching the road ahead, he also paid attention to his condition. Seeing him curled up in the seat, for a moment, he belatedly realized that Gu Qingzhou always seemed to be covered in wounds whenever he was by his side.

The streets were very empty late at night. The occasional car that roared past would stir up the fallen leaves accumulated on the ground. Jiang Xu drove a bit slower than usual, very steadily, just like his unsettled heart from the first half of his life, which was now finally willing to honestly return to its proper place.

When he parked the car downstairs, Jiang Xu couldn't help but remember what happened last time. Perhaps that memory was terrible for Gu Qingzhou, and it was just as terrible for him.

Jiang Xu opened the car door, got out, and went around to the other side. Gu Qingzhou seemed to be drunk to the point of incoherence, curled up in the seat with his head down as if he had fallen asleep. Jiang Xu, trying his best not to bump him, somewhat clumsily helped him out of the car. Seeing that he couldn't walk, he simply leaned over and carried Gu Qingzhou on his back.

The person on his back was very light. Jiang Xu had originally braced himself with all his strength, but in the moment he stood up, he only used seventy percent of it. He hooked his arms under the bend of Gu Qingzhou's knees, paused, then continued walking inside. A few scattered insects circled under the streetlight, and the faint light instantly stretched their overlapping shadows out long.

Jiang Xu carried him into the elevator, and then went upstairs. It was quiet all around from beginning to end, and they didn't run into any neighbors. He took out his key and was about to open the door, but his movements were restricted by carrying Gu Qingzhou, and he couldn't get the key into the keyhole.

Jiang Xu could only put Gu Qingzhou down, letting him lean against the wall, and held his shoulders, saying, "Don't move for a bit."

Drunk people are always restless. They might be able to lie quietly on the main road, but they can't possibly stand properly in a corner. Just as Jiang Xu was holding him with one hand and quickly opening the door with the key in the other, Gu Qingzhou suddenly started to struggle slightly, frowning as if in great discomfort.

Jiang Xu thought he had used too much force and subconsciously let go. Just as he came to his senses and was about to support him, a cool body suddenly pressed against his back. Then, his waist tightened as he was hugged from behind, and he felt the slight tickle of hair brushing against the back of his neck.

No one could describe what this feeling was like. No matter what happened, Gu Qingzhou always relied on Jiang Xu with his whole being. Even if he didn't show it when he was sober, alcohol, while devouring reason, could unearth the truest instincts from the bottom of one's heart.

Jiang Xu couldn't see Gu Qingzhou's face, but from the slight touch from behind, he could guess what the other person looked like now—ink-black hair, a clean and lost expression, stripped of its coldness, innocent and harmless.

Gu Qingzhou...

Gu Qingzhou...

His originally calm blood suddenly began to clamor at this moment, faintly roaring for something.

The key turned quickly, finally opening the lock. But as they entered, Jiang Xu pulled Gu Qingzhou directly from behind to in front of him. He shifted his body and, without any warning, pinned him against the entryway wall. At the same time, he closed the door with a backhand motion, tightly sealing them off from any prying eyes outside.

Jiang Xu lowered his eyes, gazing at Gu Qingzhou's heavily intoxicated appearance. His fingertips slid over his handsome brows and eyes, finally stopping on his pale lips, which he slowly caressed. His voice was somewhat muffled, "Gu Qingzhou..."

He murmured his name, but didn't know what to say.

The person whose name he called furrowed his handsome brows slightly, as if unwilling to be pressed against the cold entryway wall. He struggled silently, but was held down in an instant. Then, a warm sensation came upon his lips as something forcefully pried open his clenched jaw and agilely slipped inside.

This was a kiss tinged with alcohol. There was no back-and-forth confrontation, no mutual tearing that tasted of blood, only a gentle yet firm entanglement. Jiang Xu didn't know if Gu Qingzhou was conscious, but as their lips and tongues touched, he tasted some salty tears, a bitterness that reached the bottom of his heart. He held the other person tightly, slowly tightening his arms, the force so great it seemed he wanted to embed him into his own bones and blood.

Jiang Xu didn't turn on the lights, but he was extremely familiar with every piece of furniture here. He held Gu Qingzhou as they walked from the entryway to the living room, and then moved to the bedroom, walking without difficulty in the darkness. Finally, as they neared the edge of the bed, they both fell into the soft bedding.

Jiang Xu didn't know what to do; everything followed instinct. And Gu Qingzhou's unconscious struggles, like a stone thrown into the sea, gradually quieted down until not a sound could be heard. Only their low panting breaths intertwined densely, becoming the only sound in the dead of night.

Jiang Xu's fingertips brushed over Gu Qingzhou's slender collarbone, sliding slowly down over the fabric. But when they landed on the small of his back, he heard a low, pained grunt. Not knowing what he remembered, he pulled his hand back and instead held the person tightly in his arms.

Jiang Xu said, "Gu Qingzhou, let's never fight again..."

The recklessness and inexperience back then caused a five-year separation and void. A whole five years. It wasn't long, but it wasn't short either. Jiang Xu felt that they didn't have another five years to waste.

The late autumn night was cold. He pulled the blanket over, covering Gu Qingzhou, and finally rested his forehead against his, saying, "Sleep."

After several consecutive days of tossing and turning, unable to sleep, his nerves had been stretched to the limit. As Jiang Xu's mind suddenly relaxed, exhaustion washed over him like a tide. Before long, he fell asleep, still holding Gu Qingzhou tightly in his arms, his grip not loosening in the slightest.

When a person is extremely tired, they don't dream. But Jiang Xu's sleep was filled with bizarre dreams. The occasional scenes that flashed by were also blurry, and he unconsciously furrowed his brows.

He hadn't turned on the lights last night, so Jiang Xu didn't notice that the room was a mess. Everything was toppled over and in disarray, as if it had been ransacked. When the morning sun shone in through the curtains, none of it could be hidden.

The bright sunlight shining on his face was a bit glaring. Jiang Xu covered his eyelids with the back of his hand and groggily turned over. His mind was still muddled, but not knowing what he remembered, he habitually reached for the spot beside him. What he touched was indeed a bed that had long since lost its warmth. He slowly opened his eyes, a beat too late.

Jiang Xu sat up in bed, his first thought to look for Gu Qingzhou, but his gaze paused when it landed on the disheveled items on the table.

The bedroom floor was very clean, as if someone had deliberately tidied it, but it was almost too clean. Even the cashmere rug that had been in the middle of the room was gone. Looking closely, there was still a forgotten shard of glass in the corner, which glinted faintly as the sunlight poured in.

Jiang Xu pulled out a tissue, bent down to pick up the broken glass, and, for some reason, walked toward the living room.

The living room wasn't as messy as the bedroom, but it was also a bit too clean. Jiang Xu compared every corner with his memory and found that some fragile vases and ornaments were missing. And by the kitchen's island counter, a pale, slender figure was busy, either tidying up messy dishes or making breakfast, but because his body blocked his actions, it was impossible to tell.

Jiang Xu watched quietly without making a sound. He saw Gu Qingzhou carefully sorting things neatly and quietly cleaning the floor. A face after a hangover would usually be a bit swollen, but he was still thin and pale, busying himself silently in the living room without making any noise.

Jiang Xu moved his lips, calling his name, "Gu Qingzhou..."

His voice was too hoarse, and he couldn't make a sound.

Gu Qingzhou always had this kind of personality, always quietly cleaning up his own messes in secret when no one was around. Thus, outsiders could only see his stubbornness and unlikable nature. Jiang Xu didn't know how many more times this had happened—once, or many times.

The rice cooker seemed to be cooking porridge, silently letting off faint steam. Gu Qingzhou was just about to check the time when his waist suddenly tightened, and in an instant, he fell into a familiar embrace.

Jiang Xu was slightly taller than Gu Qingzhou, able to hold the latter firmly and tightly in his arms. He always said Gu Qingzhou was like a child, but in reality, wasn't he himself the same way before, acting on whims, childishly and recklessly taking advantage of the other's affection?

Jiang Xu rested his head against Gu Qingzhou's shoulder, not knowing what to say, or perhaps feeling that any words would be too pale and powerless. He could only hold him tighter, and tighter still. Finally, like a child, he said in a low voice, "Gu Qingzhou, let's never fight again."

Gu Qingzhou's body stiffened, and he didn't speak.

Jiang Xu simply turned him around, holding him face to face in his arms. Word by word, he looked down and said earnestly, "From now on, let's be together properly, and never fight again."

Those who haven't experienced it would probably find it hard to understand the feeling of recovering something that was lost, unless what you lost was just an unimportant and irrelevant item. Jiang Xu had never felt that Gu Qingzhou was unimportant, but he had never felt like he did now, that having the other person within his reach was such a good, good thing.

Jiang Xu had always thought that no one liked him. In fact, he didn't know that in high school, many girls secretly liked him. It was just that his surly demeanor scared too many people away. For so many years, only Gu Qingzhou had persisted, waiting for him day after day for ten years, waiting for him to turn around, waiting for him to look back.

So in the end, he was the only one who could walk together with Jiang Xu.

The room fell into a long silence.

After an unknown amount of time, Gu Qingzhou's hand, which had been hanging by his side, finally moved. It slowly lifted, little by little, and grabbed the corner of Jiang Xu's shirt. Then, just as slowly, it gradually tightened its grip, as if it would never let go for the rest of his life.

Gu Qingzhou could never, ever truly give up on Jiang Xu.

He finally responded with a nearly inaudible, "Mm..."