Paper Life 19

Shang Nan didn't know what game Yu Zhibai was playing this time. He quietly watched the tip of Zhang Gou's small, exposed nose, the slightly messy crown of his head, and the arms encircling him tightening more and more. Shang Nan patted the back of Zhang Gou's hand and asked in a low voice, "We aren't close, stay away from me."

Yu Zhibai was Xiao Bai, and on the surface, Zhang Gou was a perverted suitor of Shang Nan's; Shang Nan felt he should act as if he loathed Zhang Gou.

Zhang Gou looked up at Shang Nan infatuatedly for a while, then silently walked to the corner of the wall and squatted down. The corner he chose was closest to Shang Nan, and also the spot with the poorest lighting.

He sat in that shadow, one leg bent, the other stretched straight. A patch of light happened to fall on his exposed ankle; the light completely penetrated the pale skin, making the thin layer of dust on the ground look hazy.

Shang Nan just played along with it.

Time flowed quietly. The sounds of insects and birds outside were very indistinct. From the intensity of the light, one could tell that dark clouds covered the sky outside. Every tiny sound was magnified several times within the warehouse.

Shang Nan stood up. He still had half a pack of tissues in his pocket. He would be locked up here for another week, and he didn't want to sit on this chair for a week.

Or, he could see if this iron door could be pried open directly.

Shang Nan completely ignored Zhang Gou sitting in the corner.

He rummaged through a pile of junk in the warehouse, trying to find something hard enough to pry open the iron door.

The warehouse's iron door was a heavy rust red; it was as tall as the warehouse walls. Shang Nan could clearly see the giant iron lock up top, and he had seen those people use all their strength to push the iron door open, so he knew the odds of prying this door open by hand were very slim.

But even if the chances were slim, Shang Nan had to try.

Shang Nan was wearing a very thick coat with his school uniform underneath. After all that activity, he was covered in sweat. Dust filled the air in the warehouse, and he hadn't found any tools that could be used to pry the door.

Holding a broken chair leg in his hand, he stood there for a while, then threw the chair leg onto the ground. He took out the pack of tissues and resignedly began to wipe down the wooden bed that only had half a bed board left: he had to make a nest for himself first.

This bed was a folding iron frame bed. It should have had two bed boards, but since it had been discarded here, it certainly wasn't going to be an intact item ready for direct use—it only had half of the bed board remaining, while the other half was empty, with nothing there at all.

After wiping this half of the bed board clean, Shang Nan lay down on it fully clothed. He should be glad he had dressed heavily today; it wasn't so cold in such a desolate place.

He turned over to face the wall, looking at the lines of cracks upon it. Where the wall had split along the cracks, dark red bricks were exposed inside. The damp plaster gave off a very stale, ancient smell.

[14: Nannan, are you still hungry?]

Shang Nan closed his eyes. "If it's not something that absolutely needs to be said, don't talk to me. I want to save my energy."

Outside, there was dead silence. Even if the police and the school found him, it would take a day or two. And the only 'person' he could count on and rely upon had changed identities to appear here with him. Shang Nan didn't understand him, and didn't even want to pay attention to him.

After the hours of bumping around in the car, Shang Nan had been wondering: since Zhang Gou was just a vessel carrying much of Yu Zhibai's resentment, what was its temperament like?

It...

Shang Nan turned over. With this movement, his breath immediately hitched in his chest. He saw Zhang Gou stretching his neck, his face close at hand. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up almost instantly; it was an uncontrollable instinctive reaction.

Zhang Gou seemed not to have expected Shang Nan to suddenly turn around either. He blinked and retreated, his hands clutching the iron frame as he whispered an apology.

Zhang Gou's face was very pale. Because Shang Nan knew of Yu Zhibai's existence, he would pay attention to details on the other party that differed from humans. Zhang Gou was a defective product, so there were even more details to be found on his body.

It had no fine hairs, and the amplitude and frequency of its breathing were negligible. Its pupils were pitch-black, somewhat large in diameter, dark like a feline in the depths of a jungle. Its expression was fragile, its fur soft and snowy white, but the wildness and aggression in its eyes could not be hidden.

Shang Nan retreated a bit until his back pressed against the wall. After maintaining a safe distance from Zhang Gou, Shang Nan cleared his throat. "We need to find a way to get out."

He felt he had hinted clearly enough. Yu Zhibai had sent Zhang Gou here; surely it couldn't be just to have a vacation with him, right?

Zhang Gou truly rested on the iron frame as contentedly as a cat. "Why should we go out?"

Shang Nan: "?"

Shang Nan: "What... did you say?"

"I don't want to go out." A faint hope and shyness appeared on Zhang Gou's face. "Being with you makes me very happy. If we go out, I won't be able to stay with you like this anymore."

"..."

It was difficult to communicate with Yu Zhibai; it was impossible to communicate with Zhang Gou.

......

Time quietly slipped into late night.

Shang Nan's hands and feet were freezing cold as he curled up into a ball. His face rested in his palm; the dampness of the wall constantly invaded his pores. He slept groggily, feeling cold, hungry, and aching all over.

When consciousness was blurred, one's sensitivity to everything happening around them would become dull.

So by the time Shang Nan reacted, those hands of Zhang Gou had already silently embraced him tightly from behind. The other party's body temperature wasn't much higher than the wall. Shang Nan woke up and helplessly nudged Zhang Gou with his elbow. "Let go."

However, Zhang Gou held Shang Nan even tighter. He buried his face in the back of Shang Nan's neck and answered in a muffled voice, "I don't want to."

"..."

What made Shang Nan truly start to resist was when Zhang Gou placed a barely-there kiss on the back of his neck; that patch of skin immediately broke out in goosebumps.

"Zhang Gou!" Shang Nan scolded in a low voice. "Enough is enough."

The boy hadn't eaten all day and had no strength when he spoke; even his scolding voice sounded as soft as fluffy white cotton. As a result, the hands holding him tightened a little more.

Zhang Gou whispered, "Is it so bad to just stay with me like this?"

Zhang Gou encircled Shang Nan in his arms, like holding a lamb that had just been born. "You are the person I like the most in this world. Do you like me the most too?"

Grandma liked him, but she liked the human Yu Zhibai more.

Mom loved him, but she also loved the human Yu Zhibai more. Even its hatred, its resentment, were all because of the human Yu Zhibai.

Only Shang Nan. In his eyes was the Paper Person Yu Zhibai; it could see that.

Shang Nan remained silent. It was pitch black before his eyes. Zhang Gou's breathing was very faint, but his presence was incredibly, incredibly strong. Even though he couldn't see, Shang Nan could imagine what Zhang Gou's expression was like right now—gloomy, cloying, and paranoid. Yu Zhibai would have other expressions, such as attachment, or feigned shyness and introversion, but Zhang Gou had none of these. If one tore open its shell, the inside was entirely filled with resentment.

But even if it was filled with resentment, it still wanted to guard Shang Nan.

After a period of silence, Zhang Gou began to get restless behind him again. It wasn't just light kisses; its cold fingers silently lifted the hem of Shang Nan's clothes.

Shang Nan pressed down on Zhang Gou's wrist just in time. "Yu Zhibai, I told you to stop."

This time, Shang Nan didn't call him Zhang Gou; he called him Yu Zhibai.

Zhang Gou's movements stopped. He didn't know how much time passed this time before a lightly surprised tone sounded behind Shang Nan. "Nannan? How did you know?"

Shang Nan forcefully pried open Zhang Gou's hands. The narrow half-bed board was crowded with two big boys; even if Shang Nan retreated further, it would be of no avail. He turned around and looked up slightly at Zhang Gou's face. It was somewhat unfamiliar, but there were traces to follow; some expressions were exactly the same as Yu Zhibai's.

"I'm not an idiot," Shang Nan said.

Zhang Gou lowered his head, and just as Yu Zhibai had nuzzled the tip of Shang Nan's nose before, he nuzzled Shang Nan too. "And then?"

Shang Nan: "You're not going to find a way to get out?"

Zhang Gou didn't understand. "Go out to do what?"

Shang Nan was speechless for a moment. After a few seconds, he whispered, "Yu Zhibai, I'm hungry."

Zhang Gou seemed not to have reacted in time. "You what?"

Shang Nan pulled the other's palm and pressed it against his own abdomen, saying word by word, "I. Am. Hungry."

Zhang Gou's eyelashes trembled. He lowered his eyelids, lost in thought.

It indeed wanted to be with Shang Nan, to stay here until the end of time. Here, there was only it and Shang Nan, no one else; Shang Nan would belong to it completely.

But it had forgotten that Shang Nan was a human who needed to eat and drink, and perhaps needed some annoying social interaction.

Nannan was hungry.

So cute.

Zhang Gou was the vessel of Yu Zhibai's resentment; it was not kind.

To make a request of it, there were conditions.

Zhang Gou withdrew his wrist from Shang Nan's hand and instead pinched Shang Nan's chin, asking murmuringly, "What will you use in exchange?"

Shang Nan was very smart; he could see the look and obsession in the other's eyes. But since it was something he had expected to happen, Shang Nan quickly accepted it calmly.

After thinking for a long while, Shang Nan took the initiative to tilt his face up, his eyelashes trembling uncontrollably. He whispered, "Come on." Then, he parted his lips slightly.