What are you looking at?

The calendar next to the blackboard was still on the 16th. Two days had already passed, but no one had torn off the finished date. One or two mischievous students would lift a corner upon entering, only to be loudly stopped by their classmates in their seats.

Xia Wei said with a smile, "You're all just deceiving yourselves."

It couldn't be helped. With final exams approaching day by day, the students' stress surged, and they could only drag out the calendar to trick themselves into thinking there was still time. In the students' eyes, exams were also ranked. The college entrance exam was the ultimate mountain, while the regular final exams were the most important. And since they had to visit relatives and friends during the winter break for the New Year and be asked about their grades, the winter finals carried more weight than the summer ones.

During the English morning self-study session, Zhuang Fanxin wrote the day's review topics on the blackboard. After putting down the chalk, Xia Wei waved at him from outside the door before he returned to his seat.

He went out, closing the door behind him. The chalk dust on his fingertips seeped into his fingerprints, feeling unpleasantly gritty. The teacher and student stood by the window. At this time, all the classes were having their morning reading sessions, and the corridor was empty. An uninformed person might have thought Zhuang Fanxin had done something wrong.

Xia Wei began, "Are you preparing to study in the USA?"

Zhuang Fanxin asked, "Did my dad contact you?" He didn't realize he was frowning, his right hand resting on the windowsill with great force, a smudge of white chalk appearing on his fingertips.

Xia Wei looked at him, taking in the flustered expression, the irrepressible urgency. He asked him if they hadn't discussed it properly yet.

Zhuang Fanxin didn't know whether to nod or shake his head, nor could he explain it clearly in a few words. He thought for a moment and replied that his grandfather was sick in the USA, and going abroad early was related to that. Xia Wei seemed to understand. He patted his shoulder comfortingly, telling him to focus on his review and not worry too much.

"Teacher, I don't want to go," Zhuang Fanxin said.

Xia Wei joked, "Can't bear to part with me?"

Zhuang Fanxin nodded without hesitation this time. There was a lot he couldn't bear to part with, and his homeroom teacher of two years was naturally included. He remembered that on the first day of school, Xia Wei had said that if they encountered difficulties, they should learn to solve them themselves, and if they couldn't, they should tell the teacher.

He asked in desperation, "Teacher, can you talk to my parents and ask them to let me finish my third year of high school before I go?"

Xia Wei told him clearly that he could not. Teachers had no right to interfere in a student's family affairs. Parents love their children, and every step is inevitably planned with great care. Besides, if studying abroad was related to an elder's illness, he couldn't be willful, lest he be left with the regret of wanting to support his family when it was too late.

"Fanxin, you've always been very motivated and outstanding. Going abroad to develop a year earlier or later won't be a big problem," Xia Wei said. "When other teachers mention you to me, it's always about how that little painter in your class is doing. You're different from other students. Your talent in art far exceeds your talent in academics, so I was quite happy when your father told me. As your teacher, I also hope you achieve success in the field you love as early as possible."

After winning the ACC Competition, Zhuang Fanxin was already qualified to skip grades and enroll in university. During a post-competition interview, the media had also asked him if there were any schools in the USA he was interested in and if he was willing to study abroad in the USA early.

Zhuang Fanxin glanced out the window. Flashing through his mind was the night Gu Zhuoyan fought with the basketball team. That person had followed behind Head Teacher Feng, looked back at him, and smiled at him, a patch of blue and red on his cheekbone that seemed deliberately put there to make his heart ache.

"Fanxin?" Xia Wei called him.

He pulled back his gaze and murmured, "I don't want to go."

Xia Wei was still smiling. He said Zhuang Fanxin was a sensitive person and comforted him again, saying that things were still up in the air, and it was too early to be so gloomy. It was better to focus on reviewing and finish the exams first.

After the teacher-student talk, Zhuang Fanxin returned to the classroom. The moment he sat down, he was swarmed by his gossipy classmates from the neighboring seats, asking him what was up, if Old Xia had scolded him, if he wanted to eat seafood noodles for lunch, and if he wanted to go to Guangzhou to visit the flower market during the vacation.

Zhuang Fanxin responded to each of them, took out a large box of raspberries, gave a handful to the Sports Committee Member in front of him, a handful to the Class Monitor across the aisle, and pushed the rest toward Qi Nan. He rested his head on the desk and mumbled, "If I leave, will you guys miss me?"

Everyone was too busy eating to pay him any mind.

The students in the key class were still relatively self-disciplined, no longer running and playing during breaks. The classroom was a bit dull throughout the day. Zhuang Fanxin was glued to his chair, reading and doing problems, studying non-stop, afraid that if he had a spare moment, he wouldn't be able to stop his mind from wandering. Qi Nan asked him, "Are you really trying to get into the top ten in the grade?" Then he muttered to himself, "With Gu Zhuoyan gone, who's going to be first in the grade for the final exams?"

Hearing that name, Zhuang Fanxin turned to look at the last row. It was empty, with only a pile of assignment papers scattered about.

That night, talking to Zhuang Xianyang on the phone outside the convenience store, he thought he had anticipated the worst-case scenario and was prepared for it, but he hadn't expected the reality to be far worse than he imagined. When Zhuang Xianyang said the words, his brain, his emotions, even his breathing, everything seemed to freeze, immediately followed by a wave of earth-shattering panic.

He didn't want to go early. He had yelled into the phone at the time, causing the convenience store owner to poke his head out to look at him. Zhuang Xianyang hadn't expected such a reaction either. He placated him, telling him not to be anxious and tactfully asking him to be sensible, but there was no sign of him yielding to further discussion.

His family had always been democratic. Even though his talent was ingrained in his bones, they had sought his own opinion when he was a child learning to paint. This time, although Zhuang Xianyang hadn't said it was final, the sense of a settled decision was impossible to ignore. In the end, the call was interrupted by a doctor. As the dial tone droned on, the afterglow Zhuang Fanxin was watching changed into the curtain of night, and the Oden in his cup turned into a mouthful of cold soup.

He went to ask Zhao Jianqiu, but Zhao Jianqiu's attitude was ambiguous; she had probably discussed it with Zhuang Xianyang beforehand. He was extremely annoyed. When Gu Zhuoyan was here, everything was sweet as honey, but when he was away, problems kept cropping up. To put it dramatically, he had been like aimless duckweed, a broken branch tossed by the wind these past few days, unsettled from the inside out.

After suffering for two days, Zhuang Fanxin called Gu Zhuoyan. He had built himself up for a long time, but he was rendered speechless when Gu Zhuoyan told him the Physics Competition Winter Camp had begun. Gu Zhuoyan was about to have exams, in a closed-off environment, and would be unreachable for the next few days. Zhuang Fanxin swallowed a bellyful of sorrow, and the only words that came out were, "Good luck on your exams," and "I miss you very much."

School, the studio, home. Zhuang Fanxin continued his life on a three-point line, a bit crazed. He would occasionally wander the streets in agony, so panicked he didn't know which way to go. Sometimes, a sudden optimism would sprout, and he'd believe that things would eventually take a turn for the better.

The final exams arrived. Xia Wei tore off several pages of the calendar in one go. What was destined to come would come sooner or later, no matter how much one dragged it out.

The desks had to be cleared to set up the examination hall. Zhuang Fanxin sat in the last row, helping Gu Zhuoyan pack up. Test papers, supplementary books, and a particularly familiar notebook. Opening it revealed a long strip of paper that read, "I have someone I like," followed by his name.

Zhuang Fanxin smiled, stuffed everything into the schoolbag, which was so heavy he staggered every three steps. Qi Nan had to help him to Yinan's Time. Qi Nan's mom was incredibly supportive, actually launching a milk tea called "First in the Year." For an extra two yuan, you could add a rich red bean paste. After eating and drinking it, you'd have a bountiful harvest in both academics and love.

His stomach full of sugar, Zhuang Fanxin felt slightly tipsy. It took him a while of calculating to figure out how many days Gu Zhuoyan had been gone. Ding. A text message arrived at the perfect moment. It was Zhuang Xianyang's flight information for his return to the country tomorrow.

It felt like a heavy yoke was pressing down on his head. Zhuang Fanxin feigned drunkenness. Why was he out of breath after drinking milk tea? Qi Nan cursed him for faking it and pinned him to the table for a good rub, generating some heat. After leaving, a gust of cold wind blew past, making his teeth chatter and his heart tremble.

The final exams lasted for a day and a half. The first session was serious, the last one lively, but nothing could suppress the joy of the upcoming winter vacation.

It was noon when the exams ended. Zhuang Fanxin was riding his bike when he turned into a small alley and saw that the Tesla was turned around, ready to be driven out. Zhao Jianqiu must have driven out. He sped up on his way home, ran into the house, and saw a suitcase that hadn't been put away.

"Dad?" Zhuang Fanxin called out. Putting everything else aside, he had missed Zhuang Xianyang a lot after not seeing him for nearly twenty days, and he was even more worried about his grandfather's condition. He rushed upstairs just as Zhuang Xianyang, enveloped in steam from his bath, came out of the bathroom after hearing his voice.

"Finished with your exams?" Zhuang Xianyang opened his arms.

Zhuang Fanxin went over to hug him, thumping Zhuang Xianyang's back hard. Although he missed him, he was also angry. Zhuang Xianyang coughed twice in feigned weakness, his smile unable to hide his haggardness. He had even lost a noticeable amount of weight.

"Dad." Zhuang Fanxin had truly reached his limit. The moment he opened his mouth, his complicated emotions converged into one, both begging and pleading, "I don't want to study abroad right now."

He was so earnest, for the first time in his life. He was prepared with a belly full of thoughts and feelings to make his case. Given the respect and doting Zhuang Xianyang and Zhao Jianqiu had for him, maybe they would change their minds.

Zhuang Xianyang said, "There's a document folder in the inner layer of the suitcase. Get it for me."

The words stuck in his throat. Zhuang Fanxin went downstairs to get the folder. It was thick and bulging. Returning to the second floor, Zhuang Xianyang was already waiting on the sofa. He took the folder, opened it, and told him to sit down too.

The first stack of papers was the doctor's orders since his grandfather's hospitalization. Zhuang Xianyang had Zhuang Fanxin look at them. As the pages turned, he said unhurriedly that his grandfather had been at the hospital for a check-up when it happened, otherwise he might not have been saved. For now, he was stable, but it was very hard to say when it might happen again, and whether he would be as lucky next time.

Zhuang Fanxin's grip wrinkled the corners of the paper. "Is Grandpa that serious?"

"People get old. Everyone has this day." Zhuang Xianyang's attitude was calm, a state reached after processing things. "Fanxin, if he's well taken care of, Grandpa might still have two or three years, maybe three to five if we're lucky. That's why I hope you can go over early. Do you understand?"

He pulled out the second document. It was his grandfather's will, drafted by a lawyer five years ago. The jewelry company and the family's German Shepherd were all left to Zhuang Fanxin. Jewelry design was Zhuang Fanxin's dream, and his grandfather knew it. He wanted to make his good grandson's dream come true. He also knew Zhuang Fanxin had always wanted a dog but his parents wouldn't allow it, so he got one for his good grandson to inherit.

The old man had toiled for most of his life to build his business and couldn't let go in his old age. He wanted to wait until Zhuang Fanxin graduated from high school to come study by his side, so he could hand it over, bit by bit, personally.

Zhuang Xianyang said, "Dad never makes unilateral decisions, but this time, I can't be democratic." A box tumbled out of the folder. He opened it. A gemstone badge was pinned on the black velvet cushion. "This is your seventeenth birthday present from your grandfather. He made it himself."

Zhuang Fanxin reached out to take it, his hand trembling. What kind of bastard was he? After the competition, he had grumbled that his grandfather didn't go sightseeing with him, little knowing that as he grew up, the other had grown old. The roles of who was accompanying whom had long since reversed.

There was one last letter in the folder.

The long noon stretched on. He felt no hunger or fatigue. He was awake, but he was also muddled. Zhuang Fanxin sat on the low stool for a long, long time. Zhao Jianqiu put away the suitcase, Zhuang Xianyang went straight to the Art Academy to deal with work, and Bond wagged his tail nearly a hundred times.

The movement around him contrasted with his stillness. He clutched the badge, his palm aching and turning red from the pressure.

Zhuang Fanxin remained in a daze until the sun slanted west. His legs were numb. When he got up, he fell to the ground with a thud. Zhuang Xianyang returned from the Art Academy and passed him on his way upstairs. He just sat there on the floor and said, "Dad, I agree."

His voice was so soft, Zhuang Fanxin wasn't sure if Zhuang Xianyang had heard him, but he only had the courage to say it once. Maybe it was because he was too tired from reviewing, or maybe he was simply worn out from the day's emotional turmoil. He went back to his room, collapsed onto the bed, and slept. He slept for a whole day and a night straight.

It was only in his dreams that Zhuang Fanxin understood that this was what he called avoidance.

Close his eyes, pretend nothing had happened, and everything would be as it was.

The Physics Competition Winter Camp was coming to an end. Gu Zhuoyan felt like he'd been skinned by knowledge. On the day it ended, he didn't get into the car his family sent to pick him up. He hailed a taxi and went to his grandfather, Gu Pingfang's place.

Zhuang Fanxin's grandfather's illness was a wake-up call for him. He realized that for the elderly, every day they live is one day less they have, so he had to be a good, filial grandson.

In reality, he wasn't that good. Gu Zhuoyan greeted his grandfather with a burst of warmth, then, like a young master, ordered the housekeeper to cook a feast. After eating and drinking, he fell into a deep sleep, needing to recover the energy he'd lost over the past few days.

Unfortunately, he didn't sleep for long. Gu Shibo showed up at the door to catch him, afraid he would feign compliance and secretly run back to Rong City. He wrapped himself in his blanket, his eyes half-closed, and cursed Gu Shibo for judging a gentleman by his own petty standards. Before he could finish cursing, a set of clothes was thrown over his head.

A banquet at seven tomorrow evening. The driver would come to pick him up. If he was one minute late, his return to Rong City would be delayed by a day. He could figure it out himself.

Gu Zhuoyan knew what was what. He slept, woke up, washed up, and even found time to get a haircut. He set out for the banquet at six o'clock sharp, sitting in the back seat with an arm's length between him and Gu Shibo. Neither of them cared to talk to the other.

It had been two days since the exams ended. He had sent a message to Zhuang Fanxin, asking how he did, but the other hadn't replied.

Did he not do well? Gu Zhuoyan sent another message, also concerned about the old man in the USA, indirectly sending some tenderness— "Then when you see Grandma and Grandpa during the New Year, won't you be ashamed?"

He was subtly coaxing him, implying that it was okay even if he really had to go to the USA for the New Year.

Not a single reply. Gu Zhuoyan wanted to call, but before he could press the button, he noticed Gu Shibo's disdainful and mocking gaze. He pocketed his phone to start a fight first. "What are you looking at?"

Gu Shibo said, "Who wouldn't look at a fool?"

The father and son bickered all the way to their destination. They got out of the car separately and were welcomed into the banquet hall like stars surrounded by the moon, or flowers complemented by leaves. In front of the assembled celebrities, they were both quite good at putting on a front. Although their expressions couldn't be described as that of a loving father and filial son, they exuded the same air of class.

Gu Zhuoyan's face ached from smiling. He had no appetite for the delicacies. Following the social routine of successful people, he exchanged pleasantries until he felt slightly nauseous. He quietly asked Gu Shibo how he felt every time he came to this kind of occasion, wanting the truth.

Gu Shibo replied, "Bored. I'd rather be watching cartoons with Baoyan."

Yet, every time, he found himself in this boring world of fame and fortune, returning home late at night when his daughter was long asleep. He had yet to watch a single episode of a cartoon with his child.

Gu Zhuoyan had expected this answer and didn't ask anything else. He turned, swapped his drink, and strolled outside. The cold winter wind of the north rushed over. The surface of the swimming pool rippled, yet he felt relaxed and clear-headed.

His phone vibrated. He immediately took it out to see what Zhuang Fanxin had replied.

But it was the class group chat. Xia Wei had sent a message: "I'll tell everyone this in advance. At the end of this semester, our classmate Zhuang Fanxin will be going abroad to study. There is no feast that does not come to an end. I wish him all the best in the future."