His Royal Uselessness

His Royal Uselessness

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Chapter 20 - Chapter 20

Ji Weiqiu said without even thinking, "Under the vast heavens, there is no land that is not the king's. Where is there a place Imperial Elder Brother cannot go?"

Let alone anywhere else, even the Empress Dowager's bedchambers, you can come and go as you please! Of course, you generally wouldn't enter, but she is your own mother after all, so it's not impossible if you really want to.

Ji Weiqiu waved a hand behind his back discreetly, signaling for the palace attendants to quickly retreat, while he himself said with a pleasant smile, "Imperial Elder Brother has come over so early. I suppose the realm must be at peace."

Ji Su said pointedly, "It cannot compare to the prosperous age you have here."

"That is also thanks to Imperial Elder Brother's grace." Just as Ji Weiqiu finished speaking, Xingbo stood by the door and announced in a low voice, "Your Highness."

Seeing this, Ji Weiqiu nodded and said to Ji Su with a smile, "It's already this late in the blink of an eye. Imperial Physician Hu instructed your younger brother to move around more, to help the medicinal soup's properties spread throughout my limbs and body. I have to be active for the time it takes an incense stick to burn... I didn't disturb Imperial Elder Brother, did I?"

Ji Su keenly caught the key point and asked with a frown, "Not pills?"

'Big Brother, if your esteemed self keeps asking, I'm really going to be done for!'

Ji Weiqiu rubbed his nose and said, feeling a little guilty, "The journey back was probably a bit bumpy. Imperial Physician Hu said my qi and meridians were in disarray and that cold energy had entered my body, so it was best to drink a dose of medicine."

Ji Su looked down at him, seeing the young man too guilty to meet his gaze. He had wanted to say he was being mischievous and presumptuous, and that he deserved to suffer this bit of hardship. But his thoughts turned slightly, and he remembered the child ignoring his illness to return to the palace from Ganquan Villa with such longing. He was clearly coming home, yet he had to dress up as a palace attendant to enter secretly. A respected Prince was confined to a small side hall, and even for a bit of activity, he could only find a few palace attendants to play childish games with inside the hall.

He's suffering all this... simply because he couldn't bear to see him travel back and forth.

Ji Su scoffed inwardly. His expression softened slightly, and he said, "Next time, go for a walk in the garden."

"That... isn't very appropriate, is it?" Ji Weiqiu said, a little surprised.

"In Taiji Palace, no one dares to be loose-lipped." Ji Su's tone was mild, but the words he spoke were not so mild.

The matter was considered dropped.

Ji Weiqiu clenched his fist and cheered for himself internally. He knew it! As long as the reason was reasonable and the matter wasn't out of line, his brother wasn't a crazed murderer who spent his days thinking about chopping off a couple of heads to go with his wine. How could he just drag people away to be beaten to death at the slightest provocation?! It takes time to cultivate a reliable palace attendant, you know!

Thinking of this, Ji Weiqiu couldn't help but shoot a sympathetic glance at Eunuch Qingxi. 'It's hard! Too hard! To be able to stay by his brother's side for thirty years, Eunuch Qingxi has truly had it rough! No wonder when he said he wanted to take Xingbo and Mian Li with him, the two of them were as happy as could be.'

He was starting to regret it a little. Perhaps it would have been better to just stay at Ganquan Villa. Forget Eunuch Qingxi; even he, a semi-blood brother, felt like he was treading on thin ice in front of his elder brother. But then he remembered his brother rushing over from court to see him from so far away, and Ji Weiqiu felt it was alright again.

After all, it wasn't like he had never lived with his brother! The two of them had lived together for nearly ten years! For the first eight years, his brother was the crown prince and he was an imperial prince, and they both lived in the Eastern Palace, which was Changchen Palace. When he was eight, his brother ascended the throne and moved to Taiji Palace, which belonged to the emperor, and he followed him to Taiji Palace and lived there for another two years.

Two years later, when he was ten, his brother's position was stable, so he had him move back to Changchen Palace. It was from this time that the number of times he met his brother began to decrease, and after leaving the palace to establish his own manor at sixteen, he would only see him three to five times a year.

Thinking about it this way, he'd actually only been carefree for two years!

But he was adapting to living back in the palace better than he had imagined. For instance, he had already figured out that, based on the natural relationship between them, as long as he stroked his brother's fur the right way, didn't talk back to him, and showed weakness appropriately, there would generally be no major problems—for example, he hadn't been beaten today, nor even scolded.

At that moment, Eunuch Xiao Zhuo brought tea. The two brothers naturally wouldn't continue to stand and chat. They each took a seat on the arhat bed. Ji Weiqiu had been playing wildly just now, and the slightly hot tea felt a bit dry in his mouth. He frowned slightly, but he also knew that times were different now, so he drank more than half the cup in one go.

Seeing him gulp down the tea in such a hurry, Ji Su lifted a fingertip slightly. Seeing this, Eunuch Qingxi bowed slightly and retreated. Ji Weiqiu put down his teacup. The warmth forced a thin layer of sweat out of him, but he indeed felt much better than when he had entered the palace that morning. The feeling of floating on clouds was gone.

Ji Weiqiu looked at Ji Su's calm and unhurried demeanor, as if all things in the world were nothing more than floating clouds to him. He suddenly felt that his brother shouldn't be an emperor; he should be a Daoist priest. With his appearance like that of the Immortal Guye and his transcendent, worldly air, he could definitely bluff his way into being called a "Perfected Man" with just a few words. If he encountered an emperor obsessed with the art of immortality, that emperor would probably have to kowtow to him a couple of times upon meeting him.

"What are you smiling about?" Ji Weiqiu was just finding his thoughts amusing when he suddenly heard this. He paused. He didn't dare say something like, 'Brother, you should stop being the emperor and become a Daoist priest.' That was his brother's biggest taboo—anyone who had a father who was perfectly fine but then started believing in Buddhism and Daoism and ended up becoming a monster that ate human hearts and drank human blood would naturally detest Buddhism and Daoism to the extreme.

Ji Weiqiu often marveled that there were still Buddhist temples and Daoist monasteries in the capital. With his brother's personality, it was simply miraculous that he hadn't exterminated them all.

However, since Ji Su had spoken, Ji Weiqiu couldn't pretend he hadn't heard. For a moment, he didn't know what to say. After all, the topics of conversation between him and his brother were pitifully few. He had no choice but to say, "I was thinking about the people who drugged me."

Ji Su's expression shifted slightly. That transcendent, ethereal aura suddenly vanished, replaced by his usual imperial majesty. His tone was flat, yet it held a faint hint of teasing. "I thought you were going to plead for them."

Ji Weiqiu held it in for a long time before blurting out, "...I'm not an idiot!"

"The Sage said, 'Repay grievance with virtue, then with what do you repay virtue?'" Ji Weiqiu's eyes were wide and round. "They were going to use such a vicious drug on me, and you think I'd plead for them? Is the poison not yet cleared from my system?"

He had more or less found out about the various things mixed into the knockout drug. One was an addictive, chronic poison that, with long-term use, would damage the internal organs, leading to organ failure and death. The other was a nerve-disrupting drug that, with long-term use, would cause hallucinations and auditory illusions, making one's personality manic and restless.

Was there anything he didn't understand about this? They had clearly decided to capture him and then secretly control him with these two drugs. Mania and addiction—a person with a weak will like him would have trouble resisting just one, let alone both at once. At that point, wouldn't he just do whatever they told him to?

Ji Weiqiu knew it was most likely the False King's doing. There was no enmity between them, yet the False King didn't even try to persuade him to surrender first and went straight to drugging him. Wasn't he just trying to pick on the softest target?! If the False King was so capable, why didn't he raise the banner of rebellion and fight his brother with real swords and spears?!

Suddenly, Ji Weiqiu realized something—he was a transmigrator; he knew the plot. But his brother wasn't; he didn't know what the plot was about!

Without warning, Ji Weiqiu slapped his own thigh hard. 'I'm so stupid! Why didn't I think of revealing a thing or two to my brother! ...No, no, no, the fact that my brother could use me as bait means he must know something, but I just don't know how much he knows!'

"What are you doing?" Ji Su frowned. Ji Weiqiu said, "I'm angry! Imperial Elder Brother, have you found out who poisoned me? Who's behind it? Have they been dealt with?"

The tension in Ji Su's brow slowly eased. He lifted a hand slightly, and a Shadow Guard dropped down from the beams. Ji Weiqiu subconsciously took a step back—'Damn, that movement skill is too terrifying. A person just appeared in the blink of an eye! It's like a magic trick!'

Ji Weiqiu even had the leisure to think that if this kind of martial art existed in the modern era, even if you couldn't be a special agent, you could get rich as an inheritor of some intangible cultural heritage, busking on the streets.

The Shadow Guard had a plain face, the kind that would disappear in a crowd. He lowered his head and said, "Reporting to Your Highness, according to the investigation, when the Deputy Commander Zhou and Your Highness were returning to the capital, they split into three groups and released information to investigate one by one. They finally discovered a traitor within the Qingxuan Guard."

Eunuch Xiao Zhuo was a little surprised to hear this. Having followed His Majesty for these few months, he had intentionally or unintentionally overheard the Shadow Guards reporting on matters. Generally speaking, their speech was extremely concise; they would only state the answer. Only if the Emperor asked would they give more details. What was wrong today, for him to speak in such detail?

After the Shadow Guard finished speaking, he also felt he had misspoken, but seeing the Prince of Rui's burning, intensely curious gaze, he had unconsciously said a few more words.

Hearing this, Ji Weiqiu nodded gravely. "As expected, there's a trai... a spy."

"You guessed?" Ji Su asked with great interest.

"I had a vague feeling," Ji Weiqiu said. "Imperial Elder Brother sent me to Jiangnan with such a grand entourage. It couldn't have been just to investigate a few corrupt officials, right? Anyone could investigate corrupt officials, why did it have to be me? There must have been something else going on."

At first, Ji Weiqiu thought Zhou Qing was the mole, but on second thought, it couldn't be. If Zhou Qing were the mole, he would never have made it back to Yanjing. From the assassination attempt by the chef in Quanzhou Prefecture, he had felt that something was off with the Qingxuan Guard; they were a bit too lax. Later, the assassination attempt on the river was also very strange... it wasn't strange to be attacked on the ship, but the presence of archers was very strange.

That was the middle of the river! It was at least two to three hundred meters from the bank, and it was night. No matter how good one's eyesight was, how could they precisely target a single person on a large ship from two to three hundred meters away?! If they had used long arrows of refined iron and a giant bow, he might have grudgingly accepted it, but the arrows were clearly small, only an arm's length.

Thinking about it carefully now, those small arrows were more like a type of hidden weapon. Firing a hidden weapon at him on the imperial ship would be too conspicuous. After all, a large number of masters were gathered there; once that arrow was shot, whether it hit or not, the shooter would surely die. But if the person firing the arrow was on an escort boat forty or fifty meters away from him, everything would seem much more reasonable.

After all, the escort boats only had the accompanying guards. Under these circumstances, the escort boats' main focus was on the imperial ship, not themselves. They were already on shifts, and there wasn't even enough time for them to rest, so who would have the energy to care what their colleagues were doing? What's so strange about being unable to sleep and getting some air?

"You certainly are clear about it," Ji Su said meaningfully.

Ji Weiqiu knew in his heart that his brother probably thought he knew a bit too much, but the matter of the False King was like a fishbone stuck in his throat. He wouldn't feel at ease until he spoke, so he said, "Everyone else, leave us."

The attending palace staff quietly glanced at Ji Su. Seeing him nod, they all breathed a sigh of relief and withdrew. They hadn't wanted to listen for a long time! What was the point of them knowing so much about such matters! The more you know, the faster you die!

Seeing that only a few trusted aides remained in the side hall, Ji Weiqiu finally said, "Imperial Elder Brother, is there something strange about this? Looking at these few attempts, some were to kill me, and some were to capture me... it doesn't seem like the work of those corrupt officials."

Corrupt officials want to get promoted and get rich, not "get a coffin and see riches." On the imperial ship, besides him, the Prince of Rui, there were also Zhang Er and Zou San. If even one of them were accidentally injured, no matter what, the local officials couldn't stop the high-ranking court officials from making trouble! Take Zou San, for example. If he so much as scraped his skin somewhere, his father, the Vice Minister of Revenue, wouldn't dare to withhold any funds, but he would dare to send them last! Then, he could go next door to the Ministry of Personnel and have a chat with the Minister, and that local official's performance evaluation would be finished.

Ji Su asked with great interest, "Why do you think so?"

Ji Weiqiu said righteously, "What's the benefit of capturing me? There's only a benefit in flattering me! Everyone knows I went to Jiangnan by imperial decree to pray for Mother Empress's fortune... Imperial Elder Brother, your spies were probably following right behind. Wouldn't it be enough for them to figure out my temperament and make sure I don't speak ill of them when I return to the capital?"

"Besides, what would they do after capturing me? Use me as a hostage? Demand a ransom?" Ji Weiqiu said with morbid humor, "When the time comes, Imperial Elder Brother, your army will be at the city gates, and the enemy will drag me up to the city wall, shouting for Imperial Elder Brother to write an abdication edict, otherwise they'll throw me off the wall to my death..."

Ji Su calmly took a sip of tea. Just as he was about to speak, he heard Ji Weiqiu start laughing. "Hahaha, what do you think they're thinking? Is that even a choice? How important is the imperial throne? Can it be passed on just like that? If it's passed on, would Mother Empress and I still be able to live? In that case, just let me fall to my death! Afterwards, brother, you can drag them to my grave and kill them, slicing them into a thousand pieces. I will absolutely not plead for them!"

Just then, Eunuch Qingxi came in holding a small soup tureen. After greeting the two of them, he placed the tureen in front of Ji Weiqiu and said in a very gentle tone, "Your Highness, the kitchen has just prepared lotus seed and white fungus soup. Please have a few bites to soothe your throat."

Indeed, Ji Weiqiu was a little hungry. The bowl of lotus seed and white fungus soup was only slightly warm in his hands. He took a taste, and it was indeed warm, cool, and soothing. Seeing that Ji Su didn't seem to object, he lowered his head and began to eat.

There was only one tureen, and it was brought in by Eunuch Qingxi himself. It must have been at his brother's instruction.

"Thank you, Imperial Elder Brother." The tureen was tiny, and Ji Weiqiu polished it off in no time. Just as he was about to ask for another, a few memorials were thrown in front of him by Ji Su.

Ji Su tilted his head up. "Read."

Ji Weiqiu casually picked one up and began to read. The content was simple, a petition for punishment from the prefect of Jiangning. An attempt was made to assassinate Ji Weiqiu while the canal was within his jurisdiction, so naturally, he had to plead for punishment. A glance at the date confirmed it matched up.

The second one was a petition for punishment from Qian Zhiwei, the prefect of Quanzhou, with more or less the same content.

The third was a secret memorial. This kind of memorial didn't need to go through the Grand Secretariat and could be presented directly before the throne. Only the prefects of the various prefectures had this privilege. Of course, anyone who dared to spout nonsense or fill it with flattery would easily be demoted by three ranks.

The secret memorial was also written by Qian Zhiwei, the prefect of Quanzhou. In it, he used extremely euphemistic language to accuse the Prince of Rui of plundering the common people's wealth, burning, killing, looting, and extorting bribes in Quanzhou Prefecture. He acted like a completely innocent official complaining to the Emperor, while also giving the Emperor plenty of face—'Look, I'm so tactful and sensible; I have suffered so much grievance, yet I'm still reporting such a serious matter secretly to avoid damaging the royal family's reputation and to save the Emperor and the Empress Dowager from embarrassment.'

"What do you think?" Ji Su asked unhurriedly.

Ji Weiqiu waved the secret memorial. "It's a pity this Qian Zhiwei isn't writing storybooks."

Ji Su looked at him. "What do you intend to do?"

Ji Weiqiu tilted his head, looking silly. "...Huh?"

"What do I want to do?" Ji Weiqiu said. "Imperial Elder Brother, you're here, so Imperial Elder Brother can handle it! Why should I bother with this? At worst, I'll confront him in the throne hall... or maybe I can put a sack over his head and beat him up? I'll do it secretly, I definitely won't let anyone find out..."

Ji Su looked levelly at Ji Weiqiu and said slowly, "Ji Weiqiu, don't play dumb."


Skye
Skye

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